1 of 3: Ninja Cow

Camera toting Steven Frew
Smooshed from above
Spine snapped in two:
Ninja Cow.

"Oh, amazing!", gazing Suzanna Gough
Never saw the sword
Head cut off:
It's Ninja Cow.

Five-star regular Mitch Ricard
Loosened chandelier
Heart stabbed with crystal shard:
Bad-ass Ninja Cow.

Just bought a buddha Mee Wei Ming
Flying horns and hooves
Terminal bruising:
Ooooo Ninja Cow.

Won't eat curry Andrew Pope
Dark alley, meets black-belt bovine twins
Never had a hope:
Ninja Cow... DOUBLE TEAM!

2 of 3: Haiku Cow

Cow. Stood on the street.
Chews. Doesn't moo, takes a poo,
Couldn't give a fuck.

3 of 3: Sentimental Cow

Cows behind my eyelids
The imprint of a day on the streets.

Today one turned his head and feigned attack
Taking the piss

And when they take a piss:
Concrete splash-back.

I'm lucky, look at me
Laughs red-tooth man

I look at him, he's wet
Lucky he's not shit-splattered.

I've never heard a moo
The silently superior type

But I suspect they chant Om
At the conclusion of morning yoga.

An unlikely parking warden
An effective stop sign

No grass for you
Urban bovine from the Far Side.