Cutesy Wutesy

I don't like squirrels
I love 'em!

I don't like squirrels
I LOVE 'EM!!!!!!!!!!!

Furry bushy tail wail
Bushy furry wail tail

Running through my veins
All the way to my heart
…Yeah!

Pommy Granite

Oh
Oh Man
Oh Man Do
Oh Man Do I
Do I
Do I Do I Do I Do I Do
Do I
Love Pomegranate
Oh Man
Do I

Joyous juicy little jubelets of joy!
(Jewbee)
Dying my chopping board with the blood of Adam
One of God's finest creations.

Almost perfect
If it weren't for the fuckin seeds
I'm not a bird. If you want to live I'll buy your seeds as a seperate purchase.
The way Apple does things.

I love you and I will plant the seeds
And I will tend the soil
And prune your branches
You'll feel like you're in the garden of fuckin eden.

So give me your juice baby
I've spent a good 30mins
Extracting you from your hive
And papa needs some new anti-oxidants.

And once I've consumed you
My skin feels younger
My taste buds explode
And I can shoot rainbows out of my eyeballs.

Do I
Oh Man
Love Pomegranate
Do I
Do I Do I Do I Do I Do
Do I
Oh Man Do I
Oh Man Do
Oh Man
Oh

Minx and the Mirror

Drill me
Really go on and penetrate my bones.

Fill my cavities
And take pictures all you want.

Stick things in my mouth
I'll gag and even dribble a little bit.

Role play
I'll be the patient, you be the sadist.

X-rated Bertie Germ
Invite me in, minx and the mirror.

Tainted Booty

Beyonce booty
Filling the most of her pants

Gaddafi blood money
Filling the most of her pockets

Cash stoked booty
Dictatorship cushioning

And Bond ready to tap it
Ready to tap - dat - ass. (The man for naughty Bee-hinds)

A not entirely surprising love triangle.

Reynolds. Now Rs.10

They gave me a black one.

Silver coloured ribbon and star motif
Reynolds, racer gel waterproof ink
Sachin says, you can depend on it always

Turn over the scrunchy-sound packet.

Soft grip for comfort
Sleek and stylish body design
Rumble line rip at top

I wanted a blue one.

1 of 3: Ninja Cow

Camera toting Steven Frew
Smooshed from above
Spine snapped in two:
Ninja Cow.

"Oh, amazing!", gazing Suzanna Gough
Never saw the sword
Head cut off:
It's Ninja Cow.

Five-star regular Mitch Ricard
Loosened chandelier
Heart stabbed with crystal shard:
Bad-ass Ninja Cow.

Just bought a buddha Mee Wei Ming
Flying horns and hooves
Terminal bruising:
Ooooo Ninja Cow.

Won't eat curry Andrew Pope
Dark alley, meets black-belt bovine twins
Never had a hope:
Ninja Cow... DOUBLE TEAM!

2 of 3: Haiku Cow

Cow. Stood on the street.
Chews. Doesn't moo, takes a poo,
Couldn't give a fuck.